Stress Keep a Mental Gratitude Journal for Less Stress Article / Updated 10-23-2023 Feeling and expressing gratitude goes a long way toward alleviating your stress in daily life. Intuitively you know you should feel and express gratitude, but you may put it into practice less often than you think. You may look at exercise in the same way: You know you should do more of it, but you just don’t. Sometimes you need to be reminded and encouraged. Keeping a journal makes it more likely that you’ll be aware of the importance of gratitude and express gratitude more frequently. Here’s what to do: Find a time when you have a few moments to yourself and think about four or five things in your life right now for which you are thankful. This could be on the train on your way to work, on a coffee break at your desk, or at any quiet moment when you can step back and reflect. Here are some things you might be grateful for: Your health Your friends Your children Your relationship Your skills and talents Your home Your job Your life itself Add to this list and come up with additional aspects of your life for which you can feel grateful. For some people, carrying out this exercise daily may work best; for others, once a week may be enough. If you’re a good journal-keeper, you may want to jot down these objects of gratitude. Either way, try to make this exercise a regular part of your day or week. Acknowledging those parts of your life for which you should be grateful is important; expressing gratitude to others is the other part. Too often we feel gratitude but fail to express it. Our hearts are in the right place, but we don’t communicate our gratitude to the other person. This communication can take the form of a simple thank you or a more elaborate expression of gratitude. It can be in response to a specific behavior or a larger pattern of behavior on the other person’s part. It can be something that happened recently or something that goes way back. It can be someone you know personally or someone you only know of. It can be a close connection, such as a family member, or someone more remote, such as a mail carrier, an author, or your child’s teacher. These days, you have plenty of options for delivering your message. The vehicle for your gratitude could be a face-to-face meeting, a phone call, an e-mail, an instant message, a text message, or perhaps even a letter. Don’t wait for next Thanksgiving. View Article

Stress 10 Super-Stressful Jobs Step by Step / Updated 10-10-2023 Some types of jobs trigger more stress than others. What follows is a list of ten jobs or work settings that are judged to be some of the most stressful. These particular jobs were chosen because of the degree of dangers or hazards involved, the demands of the job, the amount of control the person has over what he or she does, the levels of responsibility required, and the number of hours worked. Your own job may not be on the list, but as you go through the list, try to determine which of the stressors these other jobs face can also be found in your job. View Step by Step

Stress Thinking Errors Equal Self-Imposed Stress Article / Updated 10-10-2023 Believe it or not, your own thinking actively plays a role in creating your stress. At the heart of this distorted thinking are thinking errors, mistakes or distortions in your thinking that can result in excessive stress. See if you fall prey to any of the following thinking errors and find out what you can do to fix them. Blaming When you commit the error of blaming, you distortedly blame life conditions or other people as the source of your negative feelings or situation. You may think your life wouldn't be as bad as it is now if your parents had sent you to a better school or that it's your fault that your life is so unhappy. Now, while there may be some truth in these assertions, the blame is too global and doesn't recognize the influence of other factors. By blaming someone else or some external situation, you fail to take any responsibility for your role in contributing to a possible negative outcome. This error can be a major source of anger and resentment. To correct this error, ask yourself if there might be other factors that could be contributing to the problem and not just the situation or the other person. And even if someone or something else is at fault, focus on what you could do to change or fix the situation or problem. Regret orientation This error has you focusing on all the things you didn't do in the past. It's the "shoulda" error: You shoulda married Helen when you had the chance; or you shoulda bought IBM stock when it was 10 cents; or you shouldn't have said what you did! This isn't to say that most people don't harbor some regrets. They do. A healthy regret becomes a thinking error when you beat yourself up about it and hold onto that regret too tightly for too long. The antidote to a regret orientation is accepting what you've done and what has happened to you and then seeing if you can change the consequences. Inability to disconfirm This error prevents you from changing the way you think, despite new or additional information. For example, you feel that nobody really likes you. Someone points out that you do, in fact, have friends. You immediately reject that information for a variety of reasons: She only likes you because she grew up with you; or he likes you, but he doesn't know what you're really like. It's as if your mind is made up. Reactions like "You just don't understand" or "No, no. It's much more complicated than that!" may, at times, be reflective of this inability to disconfirm error. Ask yourself if perhaps your emotions are getting in the way and distorting your perceptions. Try to reframe the situation and see it in a more objective, realistic way. Discounting positives This error is a close cousin to the previous error. Here you minimize or trivialize any positive response to who you are or what you do. For example, when told that you look great, you believe and respond, "Oh, it's only the makeup!" Or, when you're doing a good job at work and being complimented, you respond, "It was luck," or "It wasn't hard at all. Anybody could have done it." Often this error reflects some aspects of low self-esteem, fearing that being seen positively isn't a reflection of who you really are, and that this positive recognition may create expectations of you in the future that you feel you may not be able to meet. To correct this error, step back and reframe your situation. Ask yourself if you are being too quick to minimize and discount your traits, abilities, and accomplishments. View Article

Stress Manage Your Stress: A Three-Pronged Approach Article / Updated 10-10-2023 This three-pronged model of dealing with stress provides you with a useful tool to help you understand the many ways you can manage and control your stress. You have three major choices. 1. Manage your stressors The events that trigger your stress can range from the trivial to the dramatic. They can be very minor — a hassle such as a broken shoelace, a crowded subway, or the world’s slowest check-out line. They can be more important — losing your wallet, hearing sharp words from your boss, or getting a bad haircut a week before your wedding. The list of more serious stressors can be even more dramatic — a divorce, a serious illness, the loss of a job, or the loss of a loved one. The number of potential stressors is endless. Changing your “A” means altering, minimizing, or eliminating your potential stressors. Following are some examples of what this may look like: Potential Stressor Modified Stressor A crowded commute Leaving home earlier or later Constant lateness Learning time-management skills Conflict with relatives Spending less time with them Anger about your golf game Taking some golf lessons A cluttered home Becoming better organized Dissatisfaction with your job Looking for another job High credit-card bills Spending less Missed deadlines Starting projects sooner Angst about the subway Taking the bus You might be saying, “Give me a break! What planet does this guy live on? I can’t quit my job! I have to see my annoying relatives!” And in many cases you’re right. Often you can’t change the world or even what goes on in your own house. You want to change what other people think or do? Good luck! But you can sometimes minimize or even eliminate a potential stressor. This ability is strengthened if you have the relevant skills. Changing your world isn’t always possible, but when it is, it’s often the fastest route to stress relief. 2. Change your thoughts Even if you can’t significantly change the situations and events that are triggering your stress, you can change the way you perceive them. What happens at “B” — your beliefs, thoughts, perceptions, and interpretations — is critical in determining how much stress you feel. Whenever you perceive a situation or event as overwhelming or beyond your control, or whenever you think you can’t cope, you experience stress. You may find that much, if not most, of your stress is self-induced, and you can learn to see things differently. So, if you’re waiting in a long line, perhaps you’re thinking, “I just can’t stand this! I hate waiting! Why can’t they figure out a better way of doing this? I hate lines! I hate lines! I hate lines!” Chances are, you’re creating more than a little stress for yourself. On the other hand, if you’re thinking, “Perfect! Now I have time to read these fascinating articles on alien babies and celebrity cellulite in the National Tattler,” you’re feeling much less stress. Your thinking plays a larger role than you may believe in creating your stress. 3. Manage your stress responses Even if you can’t eliminate a potential stressor and can’t change the way you view that situation, you can still manage your stress by mastering other skills. You can change the way you respond to stress. You can learn how to relax your body and quiet your mind. You can learn how to reverse the stress response — how to turn off your stress and recover a sense of calm. View Article

Stress Guided Exercise for Relaxation & Reduced Stress Video / Updated 10-10-2023 With practice, you can teach yourself to relax on command by exercising various breathing techniques, tensing and relaxing targeted muscles, and by using imagery and suggestion. Follow this guided relaxation, preferably in a quiet place, and you'll feel the stress leaving your body. Watch Video

Stress How Control and Demand Impact Work Stress Levels Article / Updated 10-10-2023 A worker in a high-stress job typically faces tough demands but has little control over how the work gets done. Workers in these jobs report significantly more fatigue and exhaustion, trouble getting up in the morning, depression, nervousness, anxiety, and insomnia or disturbed sleep than workers in lower-stress jobs. Jobs with low decision latitude tend to be relatively unskilled. Employees under these conditions don't have the authority to make decisions about their work or work environment (including input about job location, flexibility of work time, the ability to telecommute, and so on). They have little opportunity to learn new skills and problem-solve on the job. Jobs with high psychological demand typically have heavy workloads (too much to do) and not enough time to do the work, as well as the pressures, conflicts, and responsibilities of the job. Picture that "I Love Lucy" episode where Lucy and Ethel work at a conveyer belt trying (unsuccessfully) to pack chocolates into their boxes, even as the chocolates come down the belt at increasingly rapid rates. Bottom line: High demands + little control = stress. Not surprisingly, when workers who face high demands are given more control and/or reduced workloads, their stress is lower. For years now, Dr. Robert Karasek and his colleagues at UMass, Lowell, have been researching job stress from a scientific perspective, attempting to determine what causes it. They've found two major variables that strongly correlate with a job being stressful: Decision latitude, or how much control workers have over their jobs Psychological demand, or the pressures of the job View Article

Stress How to Manage Stress with Imagination Article / Updated 10-10-2023 Stressed? Imagine that. You'll probably feel better if you can release that stress-producing thought and replace it with a relaxing, calm image. Here's how to put your mind at ease: Find a place where you won't be disturbed for a few minutes and get comfortable, either sitting in a favorite chair or lying down. Think of an image — a place, a scene, a memory — that relaxes you. Use all your senses to bring that imagined scene to life. Ask yourself: What can I see? What can I hear? What can I smell? What can I feel? What can I taste? Let yourself become completely immersed in your image, allowing it to relax you completely. Use your breathing as a tool to help you deepen your relaxation. Simply breathe more slowly and more deeply. View Article

Stress 10 Ways to De-Stress at Work Article / Updated 09-16-2022 One of the secrets of effective stress management at work is finding ways to incorporate a variety of stress-reduction techniques into your workday. By using these methods on a regular basis you can catch your stress early — before it has a chance to turn into something painful or worrisome. Take a look at these surefire strategies to help you nip that stress in the bud: Breathe. A day at work is usually a day filled with problems, pressures, and demands, with little time to think about relaxation skills. Your stress builds, and much of that stress takes the form of tension in your muscles. Drain that tension before it becomes more of a problem by trying some relaxed breathing. Move around: Get up and walk away from your desk — get some coffee or water, make copies. Walk around a lot, and at lunch be sure to get out of the office and take a quick stroll. Stand up some of the time you’re on the phone. And if you have a cordless model, walk around. This gives your body a chance to use different sets of muscles and interrupts any buildup of tension. Stretch and reach for the sky: For many of you, your days are characterized by long periods of sitting at a desk or stuck in a cramped work area, punctuated only by trips to the coffee or copy machine. Other folks are on their feet all day. In either case, stretching is a great way of releasing any tension that has accumulated in your muscles. Soothe yourself with sound: If you can orchestrate it, listening to calming music at your work site can unruffle your feathers. A radio, tape or CD player, and some appropriate music can be very relaxing. Classical music, especially Bach and Mozart, works nicely. If these composers are too highbrow, try one of the “lite” radio stations. Just keep the volume down, or use a headset. Lighten up: The right lighting in your workspace can reduce eyestrain and make your environment a more pleasant place to work. Go for soft and indirect lighting. Just make sure you have enough light. Create visual resting spots: Give your eyes — and your mind — a break with photos, artwork, or a plant. At regular intervals, look away from your computer screen or paperwork and focus on a distant object to “stretch your eyes.” You can also create visual relief to your office by adding a few interesting objects. For example: Organize your desk: How can a neater desk reduce stress? Well, because the source of many types of stress comes from a feeling of being out of control, of being overwhelmed. When your work area looks like a battlefield, you feel the tension growing. And when you can’t find that report you need, your stress level soars even higher. By organizing your files and piles, you get a sense (perhaps mistakenly) that there is some order in all the chaos. Become EC (ergonomically correct): Your desk or workspace can cause stress for other reasons besides disorganization. The problem is, your body was not designed to sit and work in one place for long periods of time. When you sit in a stationary position for long periods of time, your muscle groups contract. The blood flow to these muscles may become reduced, resulting in oxygen-deprived muscles. This can lead to pain, strain, muscle aches, and fatigue. Nourish your body (and spirit): What goes into your mouth from 9 to 5 (or from 8 to 7) can make a big difference in your stress level. Eating the wrong foods, or even eating the right foods, but in the wrong amounts, and/or at the wrong times can make it harder for you to cope with the stress in your life. When you eat poorly, your body doesn’t work as efficiently as it should. This means that you’re not in the best position to handle all the pressures and demands you must face at work. Work it out: If you can swing it, one of the better things to do on your lunch break is to hit the gym or health club. Many clubs and gyms are conveniently located near work sites. A number of exercise facilities may even offer you a corporate discount for joining. Better yet, many companies and organizations have workout facilities right on their premises. Work up a sweat, take a shower, and then have a quick but nourishing bite to eat. View Article

Stress Stress Management For Dummies Cheat Sheet Cheat Sheet / Updated 04-12-2022 Identifying the symptoms of stress is an important first step to reducing tension in your life. Once you identify the signs of stress, use your imagination and the proven tool of progressive muscle relaxation to put your mind and body at ease. View Cheat Sheet

Stress Cope with Stress by Having a Talk with Yourself Video / Updated 04-01-2022 When you find yourself in a stressful situation, having a simple dialog with yourself can de-escalate the situation, take away your anxiety and stress, and help you cope. You can teach yourself to talk through your stress, put things into perspective, and empower yourself to deal with just about any stressor. Download this audio script along with the companion script " Guided Muscle Relaxation" Watch Video